Nim's Island: A Positive Father-Daughter Movie
April 28th, 2008 by Glenn Sacks, MA for Fathers & FamiliesJeana, a reader, recently wrote me about the new movie Nim's Island. She says:
"I wanted to tell you to take your daughter to see Nim's Island. It's about a widower scientist who lives on a deserted island with his 10 or 11 year old daughter and who becomes separated from her and tries (and succeeds) in finding his way back to her.
"It shows a great father image, a wonderful relationship between a father and daughter, and a strong, resourceful girl (who is that way because of the unconventional life her dad and her live).
"It's a great movie, and I think it would get 2 thumbs up from Father's Rights Activists."
Have any readers seen it?
To learn more about the movie, see the trailer here, the Wikipedia write-up here, or the theatrical trailer here or below.
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April 28th, 2008 at 6:24 pm
I have not even heard of the movie, so thanks for posting about it. However, I do know of a handful of other positive father/child movies to add to the list:
* Full Monty
* Kramer vs. Kramer
* Mr. Doubtfire
* Pursuit of Happiness
MXY
April 28th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
I watched this with my son and daughter ... I couldn't believe it .. yes a male is portrayed in a positive light .. shocking !
April 28th, 2008 at 6:31 pm
Saw it with my two daughters - fantastic movie! As a single dad it is great to see a movie like this, as it's a very rare occurrence.
April 28th, 2008 at 6:49 pm
Dare I ask: does daughter relentlessly pick dad apart with snide comments and bratty remarks?
G_R
April 28th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
I'd see it just because of Gerard Butler.
April 28th, 2008 at 7:24 pm
Another movie that hits all the right buttons for fathers' rightists is the animated movie Robots, where the mom engages in all kinds of negative controlling behavior, and the good guys win.
April 28th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
Fantastic movie. Perfect combination of a girl-as-main-character and father-daughter love. Highly recommended.
April 28th, 2008 at 8:34 pm
Jeana,
Thanks for sharing this. I will probably watch this one with my daughter.
We recently watched "The Game Plan" on video and I thought it was also a pretty good father/daughter movie. The relationship started off a little rocky, but I think it did a good job of showing how the two characters really needed each other.
I'm glad to see that Hollywood is finally doing some things like this.
April 28th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
This reminds me of something I saw take place less than one hour ago, while sitting outside a grocery store drinking a Dr. Pepper after having gone bike riding. A young couple with their daughter in tow passed a homeless man, who had been sitting out at the parking lot exit with one of those signs that must have said "need help.." or whatever (I was sitting at a distance so could not read exactly what it said). After they passed the man, I saw the daughter run back and hand him something - apparently the father or mother had given her some money to give him. It wasn't so much the idea of giving him money, as letting the young girl approach the man by herself. That made my day. It is all but impossible to find parents these days, who are not either paranoid or just out of malice pretend all men are molesters or dangerous criminals; to not only let the girl interract with him, but to encourage her to do so so that she will not grow up to be one more fearful ninnie like so many girls (and boys) will grow up to be, distrustful of all men.
This was such an exceedingly rare instance that the only thing I can think of within the last two or so years, that compares to this, was two young girls actually sitting out by themselves, selling lemonade, on the street corner where I used to live. Perhaps there are some sane parents after all.
April 29th, 2008 at 1:44 am
I will go see it.
Marcy Ganz
San Diego, CA
http://crispe.org
April 29th, 2008 at 6:55 am
We can also say that 'Psycho' can be added to the list, MasculistXY. ^_^
April 29th, 2008 at 11:06 am
"We can also say that 'Psycho' can be added to the list, MasculistXY. ^_^"
Lol!!
April 29th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Jay R,
The movie is not aimed at adults; it is aimed at children. But adults would like it too. Jodie Foster is in it as well as an agoraphobic best selling author with neuroses but who helps out the little girl. Now you really won't see it. But maybe people who don't hate girl children will like it. It is a movie highlighting a very positive and loving father-child relationship...I didn't think anyone would object to a female child...I was wrong.
April 29th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
Jeanna said:
"I didn't think anyone would object to a female child...I was wrong."
On some occasions (not this one) I object to certain depictions of female children, but only in circumstances where I perceive that female children are being treated as more loveable or are receiving preferential treatment compared to boys due to chivalry. For example, some fathers seem to be much more protective of their daughters than their sons. We mustn't confuse anger towards double standards with angers towards women. They are unrelated.
On a related note, I would also like to see more positive mother-son images. While the phrase "daddy's girl" is largely positive, the phrase "mama's boy" is largely negative.
MXY
April 29th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
MasculistXY,
Don't you think in general that fathers (and mothers) are more protective of daughters than sons? I think that reflects societal standards (worldwide societal standards, actually) and that is something that I also think needs to change. I think sons need to be protected AS MUCH as daughters instead of the belief that they should go out there and sow their oats and engage in (potentially dangerous) boy activities. But then, MRAs object to what they see as feminists or women in general "feminizing" boys. So where do you draw the line? It's hard to tell.
You're right about "mama's boy" being more negative. Boys aren't supposed to need their parents as much as girls are supposed to need their parents. More of society imposing strict unfair standards on males.
April 29th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
There needs to be some more positive father-son movies - movies about the relationship (yes, I'm sure there's a couple out there. But it seems like on this board there's disproportinate focus on father-daughter, as far as media productions). Also needed are movies which show groups of men in a positive light instead of "gangster-type" behavior, or otherwise have the men engaged in violence or deception (yes, I'm sure there's a couple already out there. We need to see more.). I've noticed that there are literally dozens of movies which show groups of women in these types of positive relationships, being empowered or whatever. Although, yes, I'm sure there's a couple that show "dysfunctional" relationships. but that's far more benign than actual violence. Especially since the ones with women always end up with a peace-making, or some type of solution or fullfilment , at the end. Whereas the ones with men usually end up with somone shot.
April 29th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Yes, I know it is often men who star in and make these type of negative movies. So what, that fact doesn't prove anything. It doesn't make it "men's own problem to fix" - you cannot blame an entire class of people for the actions of some of its members.
April 29th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
And what boy activites do you think are dangerous, Jenna? Because that's another thing I'm sick and tired of: Categorizing everything as dangerous or unhealthy. On the same level as categorizing all masculinity as bad.
April 30th, 2008 at 12:21 am
Eagle30,
Potentially dangerous boy activities include engaging in sports like football, basketball, etc.; being free to be out later than girls at younger ages (and so being more prone to getting in trouble); being encouraged to be more aggressive than females resulting in, I think, being encouraged to fight more than work things out by talking; and having a greater chance of owning a weapon (like a gun or a pocket knife).
This is my opinion. I think, though, that we want boys to be tougher and so we encourage more of the aggression in them and less of it in females. I know girls can also play rough sports, shoot a gun, fight, etc., but it seems like it is way more acceptable in boys.
April 30th, 2008 at 11:56 am
Gee. Now that I know that "asininity" is a basis for deletion by Glenn, I'll have to try again. Here goes ...
Ahem. How sad it is that a movie showcasing a positive father role is SO rare that it is worthy of kudos on that basis alone. And how curious it is that a father-daughter relationship seems to be more highly valued that a father-son relationship by some who post here. I have to wonder why that is.
BTW, Jeana, yes, I hate little girls, and kittens, and warm Spring days, etc. Why are you so interested in what other people "hate"? And how dare you presume to judge, when blind misandry seems to be your guiding credo? Dealing with you is like trying to describe blue to the blind.
April 30th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
Jeanna said:
"Potentially dangerous boy activities include engaging in sports like football, basketball, etc.; being free to be out later than girls at younger ages (and so being more prone to getting in trouble); being encouraged to be more aggressive than females resulting in, I think, being encouraged to fight more than work things out by talking; and having a greater chance of owning a weapon (like a gun or a pocket knife).
This is my opinion. I think, though, that we want boys to be tougher and so we encourage more of the aggression in them and less of it in females. I know girls can also play rough sports, shoot a gun, fight, etc., but it seems like it is way more acceptable in boys."
Nice post Jeanna. I believe that females should have permission that it is okay to be strong/dominant, and I also think that males should have permission that it is okay to be "weak"/submissive. Personally, I believe that personality might even be a larger predictor of human variability than gender itself.
I do think though, at least in modern times, that men experience even less freedom to deviate from their restrictive gender roles than females. After all, seldom do females report feeling shamed or "ememilated" in the same way that some males report feeling "emasculated." In addition, the phrase "tom boy" is largely positive, while "sissy" is largely negative.
MXY
April 30th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
I am reposting, since I spotted some typos in my previous post.
Jeanna said:
"Potentially dangerous boy activities include engaging in sports like football, basketball, etc.; being free to be out later than girls at younger ages (and so being more prone to getting in trouble); being encouraged to be more aggressive than females resulting in, I think, being encouraged to fight more than work things out by talking; and having a greater chance of owning a weapon (like a gun or a pocket knife).
This is my opinion. I think, though, that we want boys to be tougher and so we encourage more of the aggression in them and less of it in females. I know girls can also play rough sports, shoot a gun, fight, etc., but it seems like it is way more acceptable in boys."
Nice post Jeanna. I believe that females should have permission that it is okay to be strong/dominant, and I also think that males should have permission that it is okay to be "weak"/submissive. Personally, I believe that personality might even be a larger predictor of human variability than gender itself. As long as femininity is not considered to be morally superior to masculinity, I don't see much problem with masculizing females a bit or feminizing males a bit as long as the individual in question is okay with that arrangement. Gender roles hurt us all.
I do think though, at least in modern times, that men experience even less freedom to deviate from their restrictive gender roles than females. After all, seldom do females report feeling shamed or "efemilated" in the same way that some males report feeling "emasculated." In addition, the phrase "tom boy" is largely positive, while "sissy" is largely negative.
MXY
April 30th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Jay R.
I don't think that it is SO rare that a movie shows a positive parent-child relationship. But it is not often that a movie shows a single father raising his child in a very positive way. And the girl Nim could easily have been a boy; there was nothing girly about her. If you must know, I sent that email to Glenn because he has a daughter the same age as the main character in the movie, and I was just giving a suggestion to take her to see it. I was not trying to make any statement about the superiority of little girls or anything else. You did, however, express disgust at the fact that the child was a girl. That was an interesting comment by you, especially since I've seen others post things about feminists willing to let their boy children suffer while promoting the interests of girls (which is not true). A child is a child. I was not expressing misandry; if anything, you were expressing misogyny.
You were reading way too much into a movie suggestion. Do you get outraged at Ebert and throw cushions at your tv if a chick flick gets a thumbs-up? Just curious.
April 30th, 2008 at 5:34 pm
Jeana @"You did, however, express disgust at the fact that the child was a girl."
Jeana, you are a liar, and/or you are delusional. I never said, nor implied, any such thing. In an attempt to slander me, you once again transparently "project" your own proclivities onto others (your own preference for a girl character). My original (deleted by Glenn for being an impermissible thought) and subsequent (less caustic and sarcastic) posts make clear (to anyone but a blinded ideologue), that my disgust stems from the fact that depictions of positive father-child relations are rare enough (in both your and Glenn's opinion) that they are worthy of special mention and praise, and that depictions of positive father-son relations are, in my opinion, even rarer still. How you contort this into "disgust that the child was a girl" is astonishing -- and says more about you than me.
@ "I was not expressing misandry; if anything, you were expressing misogyny. "
Sure I was -- in your twisted little mind. Care to explain how ANYTHING I said evinces "hatred" of women? (In your mind, anything but praise is "hatred," it appears ... .) "Confirmation bias" is the hallmark of your comments and conclusions posted here. Too bad that condition precludes actual understanding.
Just DON"T put words in my mouth -- or they will be expectorated, and you will again end up with "egg" on your face.
April 30th, 2008 at 6:07 pm
Well, Jay R,
Didn't you say something like, "Oh great, a girl character. Now I'll be sure not to see it."? I think you did. Maybe I dreamt it.
Plus, I have no preference for a girl character--I have a son and he'd rather see boy characters. But this movie appeals to boys and girls.
I could care less if it is father-son or father-daughter or father-both; I think the positive message is the role of the dad.
The only thing ever on my face is makeup. No eggs.
IT WAS A SIMPLE MOVIE RECOMMENDATION. THERE WAS NO SECRET FEMINIST SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE. INTENDED. Why are we arguing about this?
May 2nd, 2008 at 1:24 pm
Jenna
Football, Baseball, and general sports are "Dangerous"? In what way? Seriously.
Here is another problem I've been encountering with branches of feminism that's a commonality embedded deep in the preachers: A hostility and bias towards anything traditionally considered masculine or anyone who displays characteristics considered "Masculine" like assertiveness or aggression.
You're equation of "Aggression" as "Violence" (or in your case, sports as "Dangerous") is definatly a flying leap in logic.
Do you seriously consider aggression and assertiveness as something negative, unhealthy and violent? You're being assertive in your responses so would you hold yourself to these standards?
And I have to laugh at your assumption that staying out late is a "Guy" thing. Certainly cancels out all those girls and women who sneak out for a late night on the town with both the same and opposite sex. Believe it or not, women also stay out at times equivelant to guys.
May 2nd, 2008 at 4:31 pm
TheMovieSpoiler.com
The Movie Spoiler has a detailed summary of the film for those who want to discuss it.
A few observations:
1) While the film shows a positive image of the father, at the same time it implies that the young girl desperately wants a mother figure in her life and this is a way for her to achieve that with Jodie Foster's character dropping in and getting romantically involved with the father later. Nothing wrong with that (Last Action Hero did the same thing but with a single mother and son). But this isn't a film about a COMPLETE single father/daughter relationship. At the same time, it's good that these issues are addressed in a constructive way for the children having these feelings.
2) Irony alert! Jodie Foster is a single mother of 2 via anonymous sperm donor due to either being unable to relate to men due to some pathological psychological disorder or because of successful career woman syndrome. So it's wierd to see her in a role of relating to young girls craving a compete nuclear family. What was going through Jodie Foster's mind while filming?
May 6th, 2008 at 1:22 am
Two thumbs up for Nim's Island. Abigail Breslin gave a marvelous performance.
I had my daughter Alexis this past weekend who turns 6 on the 9th and asked her if she wanted to see Nim's Island.
She said yes and got all excited and my wife and I and Lexy all raced to get ready to head out to the theater.
When we got into the theater, Alexis cuddled up in her chair next to me, having her popcorn and fruit snack and went on to love the movie. In the end I asked her what her favorite part was and she told me when Nim found her dad.
She then gave me a big hug and told me, "I love you daddy. Can we go tomorrow and watch this again?"
Now my daughter wants the DVD for home so her and I can watch it 'over and over' as she said.
In a related note, Kudos to 5 year old John Russo. His Dad, and a friend of mine as well as his being the state coordinator for F4J in Missouri showed the value of fathers in his five year olds school production.
Mike Russo in real life is the Superhero "Captain Justice" and with Mike's ex and her family who has helped play the games on Mike with his children present, little John's teacher asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up.
Little John answered, "A Super Hero." I smiled when Mike told me about it.
Three Cheers for the Role Model of Captain Justice and Three Cheers to 'Daddy Jack' and coming home with Protozoa Nim.
If you haven't taken your children to see this heart touching film, I suggest you do. This movie is a four star winner in my book.
June 5th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
Yes... I also thought it was a great father/daughter movie, but I didn't like the fact that the daughter would call her dad by his first name. The kid would refer to her father by his first name while she would refer to her deceased mother as mom.