Man Stabbed in Domestic Dispute, Almost Dies--and KABC Morning Hosts Think It's Funny
May 5th, 2008 by Glenn Sacks, MA for Fathers & Families
Apparently the filming of the new James Bond movie Quantum of Solace is being plagued with problems. While listening to McIntyre In The Morning on KABC in Los Angeles this morning, I was dismayed when KABC entertainment reporter Debra Mark (pictured) lightly and semi-laughingly mentioned that one of the film crew had been "stabbed in a domestic dispute."
In fact, according to the UPI article she was reading from (see below), the man almost died. Host Doug McIntyre (pictured below) and co-host Rob Marinko, both normally reasonable men, seemed mildly amused, too.
All together now--"If a wife was stabbed and almost murdered by her husband, would we be amused by it?"
As we've discussed before, this light dismissal of male victims of domestic violence is common in the media. I detailed one of them in my co-authored column Suppose Roles Had Been Reversed in Clara Harris Case (Houston Chronicle, 1/27/07).
Worker on new 'Bond' film found stabbed
UPI, May 4, 2008
DORNBIRN, Austria, May 4 (UPI) -- A 58-year-old working on the Austrian set of "Quantum of Solace," the latest James Bond movie, has been stabbed in a domestic dispute, police say.
A police spokesman said the unidentified technician was in "critical" condition after allegedly being attacked by a woman in Dornbirn, the Mail on Sunday reported.
"The woman appears to have attacked the man with a steak knife in the bedroom," an unidentified police spokesman said.
"He suffered deep cut wounds to the head and hands, and the first policeman to arrive thought he had died as his pulse was so weak and there was so much blood."
The discovery of the wounded crew member Saturday morning marked the third unusual event involving the production of the 22nd Bond film, the Mail said.
The British newspaper said a 29-year-old crew member survived a car crash two weeks earlier in Italy and a stuntman was seriously injured six days later while filming a chase scene.
Note: If you or someone you love is being abused, the Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women provides crisis intervention and support services to victims of domestic violence and their families.]
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May 5th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
Note the use of 'domestic dispute' not 'domestic violence' and the complete absence of 'attempted murder'.
And isn't it normal to have some statement about whether the police are considering or have brought charges?
May 5th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
It's normal... just like woman-on-child sexual assault is called a "relationship" and when it's man-on-child it's called "rape."
May 5th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
Two things .... Debra Mark typical .. ... and the second ...Doug McIntyre and co-host Rob Marenko males pandering .. because they think that if they pander they'll "get some" later on with the women listeners and that pandering to women will get them up the corporate ladder
Debra Mark her ignorance is displayed ... as for the other two …. wimps.
When I’m “out and about” and women make remarks like this I let them know what I think .. if a guy defends her remarks I let him know about what I think of him and her …. I don’t make to many friends this way .. and yes it has limited my relationships with women .. but I would rather have limited options than be subject to this tripe.
Until men take a stance this will never change .
If it wasn’t for this web site I think I would go crazy !
May 5th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
I remember the huge media outcry when Sean Connery said that he felt that if a woman was emotionally abusive and refused to leave him alone that a man slapping her was reasonable.
Indeed, DV against men today is now so commonplace as to be almost required by women. If she's not slapping him around just for the fun of it, she's a "wimp". My wife was shocked when she heard women out in public just badmouthing their husbands as jerks and monsters in a casual manner. We now live in a openly anti-male culture and the challenge is to see if men think it's ok before taking it to the next level (whatever that is.)
May 5th, 2008 at 4:14 pm
Film is actually called Quantum of Solace , I believe . There have been reports over here of a jinx on it as sveral people have been injured or something . This may partly explain why this report goes under the funny peculiar catgeory , but it should not be funny haha ..
May 5th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
yes, it is Quantum of Solace--the UPI had it wrong, and I followed it. I fixed it.
May 5th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Women are basicallly treated as children in our society. They are in no way resposible for their actions.
Only men are truly held to any kind of adult standard.
So much for being viewed as equals ladies.
May 5th, 2008 at 4:37 pm
PK:
Indeed, DV against men today is now so commonplace as to be almost required by women. If she's not slapping him around just for the fun of it, she's a "wimp". My wife was shocked when she heard women out in public just badmouthing their husbands as jerks and monsters in a casual manner. We now live in a openly anti-male culture and the challenge is to see if men think it's ok before taking it to the next level (whatever that is.)
Too true. These days it has become accepted and expected for women to badmouth and abuse men. Its just as trendy as bashing the Bush Administration. A few weeks ago I was sitting in the breakrooom during lunch and there were these three women talking and somehow the conversation got to pain tolerance. For some unknown reason all three of them agreed with the conclusion that men cannot take pain and proceeded to go on and on about how men turn into babies over the slightest injury. Now I'm not trying to sound supermacho or anything but that's pretty damned insulting. But I am very glad that when I said something they didn't go for their trumpcard (childbirth).
All together now--"If a wife was stabbed and almost murdered by her husband, would we be amused by it?"
No we'd be reading feminist blogs (the exact some ones that will ignore this story) go on about how the patriarchy is unfairly punishing this victim of the patriarchy to keep in her place and they would then proceed to call anyone that doesn't agree with them childish names.
May 5th, 2008 at 5:03 pm
The bigotry of these radio announcers is reprehensible. Nevertheless, the case is not quote what the English language press has reported. For those who can read German, see http://vorarlberg.orf.at/stories/275252. For those who can't, among the highlights in the German newspaper report on this case are:
* both the man and the woman were injured,
* they each attacked the other with a steak knife,
* both were drunk out of their minds - the woman had 2 Promille (I think "promille" may mean parts per 1,000, but my command of German isn't quite good enough for me to be sure) of alcohol in her blood the man had 1.5 Promille.
I wish the media would start focusing on the destructive role that alcohol and/or drugs often play in these sorts of cases, rather than always turning it into a gender war.
May 5th, 2008 at 5:11 pm
I would bet they laugh about prison rape, too -- so long as the prisoners raped are male.
May 5th, 2008 at 5:35 pm
Over here on our Guardian paper site there is an article about your healthcare cost crisis - I have added a comment saying the huge , mainly male prison population and its costs don't exactly help matters .
May 5th, 2008 at 5:41 pm
woman good
man bad
May 5th, 2008 at 5:59 pm
According to Mark's account of the story he linked (I _barely_ read German), it appears that we have the perfect test. Shall we ask all the presenters who made light of the worker being stabbed to comment on the woman's injuries?
May 5th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
First, I do want to thank Glenn for referring to me as "normally reasonable." If the producers were reasonably normal they wouldn't have a crack ho like Amy Winehouse contributing to the usually great James Bond movie scores, but I digress.
What can I say - I'm a huge Bond fan and I just hope the poor bastard's failure to dodge his wife cutlery doesn't delay the film's release. I'm happy to hear that he at least got in a few shots himself.
May 5th, 2008 at 8:28 pm
danny,
"For some unknown reason all three of them agreed with the conclusion that men cannot take pain and proceeded to go on and on about how men turn into babies over the slightest injury. Now I'm not trying to sound supermacho or anything but that's pretty damned insulting. "
MCA, Esther Vilar in her bestseller "The manipulated man", says women are much, much, more callous, and unfeeling then men are.
She says it's a sort of male perversion, kinda like an "infantile man child" worshipping a sort of god mother menatlity that insists women are more feeling and sensitive.
May 5th, 2008 at 11:31 pm
Love the double standardshere: when the minor crime is simple assault and the major crime is Domestic Violence, the event is cited as 'simple assault'. When the minor crime is Domestic Dispute and teh major crime is attempted homicide, the event is cited as Domestic Dispute.
Lace Curtain redorting at its finest.
Gunner Retired
May 6th, 2008 at 12:21 am
BTW, does anybody have a recording of this? I believe it happened, I'd just like to hear this moron and the two males pandering for sex.
May 6th, 2008 at 10:39 am
If only he had been kicked in the crotch as well. That is ALWAYS a laugh riot!
May 6th, 2008 at 11:06 am
It is common, particularly on television and in the movies to present violence by women against men as funny. Therefore, it comes as no surprise that this person had that reaction. She's a product of her culture.
May 6th, 2008 at 11:52 am
Those were the days!
Danny says: "Too true. These days it has become accepted and expected for women to badmouth and abuse men. Its just as trendy as bashing the Bush Administration. A few weeks ago I was sitting in the breakrooom during lunch and there were these three women talking and somehow the conversation got to pain tolerance. For some unknown reason all three of them agreed with the conclusion that men cannot take pain and proceeded to go on and on about how men turn into babies over the slightest injury. Now I'm not trying to sound supermacho or anything but that's pretty damned insulting. But I am very glad that when I said something they didn't go for their trumpcard (childbirth)"
PK responds: I'm reminded of the shows such as "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" or "Charmed" which target young women demographics and potray petite blonde women kicking 6 foot tall men in the face and knocking them out. At the same time, usually on the same channel, there are continuous Lifetime style shows potraying women are helpless victims of DV.
Anyways, my wife (don't look at her, she's taken!) also found it strange, Danny, that women would get together in a group and bash their husbands. She loves me and knows I have her interests at heart. If she has a gripe, I'm the first to hear about it so there is no need for her to gossip with her friends. I wonder if maybe most PEOPLE in our modern culture don't have close relationships with their spouses?
I've tried talking about these kinds of issues we talk about here with other American couples and usually the men get very defensive and start posturing and making excuses for their wife's actions. Then it gets personal and I have to end it there or risk alienating them as friends or colleagues. Men in our modern culture remind me of the Edith Bunker character in "All the the Family" where Edith is portrayed as a submissive wretch who contributes to her own oppression for fear of retaliation. In all my life, I never met such a woman even having lived in very working class white neighborhoods. I did meet plenty of men who acted like this character though!
Back to Buffy: In all such women's serials, they have love interests that are strong and traditionally masculine and are not victims of women. In some cases, the men are even chauvanist sexists! So this introduces a feedback loop where such chivalrous men who put up with and welcome abuse by women become less masculine and repulsive to them and deserving of such abuse. Lather, rinse, repeat. How much longer can our society take this?
May 6th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
It has been more than ten years since convicted baby killer Louise Woodward walked away after murdering a baby. If you look at the way the media treated her and the way Scott Peterson was treated for killing his wife and unborn child there is a difference of night and day. Why does the media not refer to Louise Woodward as a convicted baby killer?
May 6th, 2008 at 3:55 pm
Glenn, This was discussed on KABC this morning. Doug said you were a nice guy who had been on the show before and seemed to be cool about the whole thing.
May 6th, 2008 at 8:01 pm
I have emailed the KABC Station and voiced my opinion and displeasure about the laugh and joking about the subject of domestic violence against males, how the attitude of the crew of the morning show is only perpetuating that domestic violence is acceptable on males.
Do not think it will make a difference, but at least i got solace in complaining.
My 2 cents.
May 7th, 2008 at 6:13 am
Ro -
She (Louise Woodhead) may have been convicted, but I was always suspicious of the way the Jury reached their decision in that case, mainly down to how the prosecution presented the 'evidence.'
The child (Mathew if I recall) had a medical history that could have (and her lawyers argued did) make it much more likely that his brain trauma was due to an older injury rather than the result of so-called "shaken baby syndrome."
There have been several cases in the UK where the evidence given by 'experts' on this syndrome has been disputed at appeal and the convictions overturned. One such case has just gone to appeal.
I don't know what the truth is/was regarding Ms Woodhead, but there are enough doubts around to warrant holding off on labelling her a "convicted child killer" even though this is (technically) true.
Would the press would show the same forbearance to a man convicted under similar circumstances?
Probably not.
May 7th, 2008 at 6:35 am
Jean,
I don't know how you KNOW this information about the teacher. I call your bluff on this one.
May 7th, 2008 at 6:39 am
This is a simple one if we play the reverse game.
1) Female film crew stabbed and in critical condition ----------------> moment of silence and candlelight vigil
2) Male radio personality snickers about it -----------------------------> upheavel towards, suspension or worse
The two men on the show who just went along are, in this case, despicable.
May 7th, 2008 at 8:55 am
Glenn,
I believe that is why there was no media interest in my case. The fact that I was battered, granted a restraining order and she was ordered to batterer's intervention classes means nothing. The fact that she is the Executive Director of a Domestic Violence Center should have raised some eyebrows, but nothing. She still runs that center, and is quoted in the paper quite often, each time throwing out unsubstantiated statistics. And remember there is a permanent injuntion for protection that I have against her, and she was ordered to a class for batterers! My children and I still live in fear of this woman, but apparently the dynamics of this case were not as newsworthy as I thought, or other people close to the case thought.
May 7th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
Oh. I figured domestic violence centers were against DV, not training areas for it. How odd.
May 7th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Peregrine John,
This one is. She has run this center for over 5 years. It is 1 of 41 certified domestic violence shelters in the state of Florida. Try being a victim od DV and your abuser is a leader in that field. I have suffered financial ruin due to her, as well as emotional distress, and I can not get any help here. Nothing shocks me anymore. My friends and family still can't believe she runs that DV center. Really amazing considering that I do have a permanent restraining order against her ordered by a Circuit Judge. I have not even gotten any help from the men's right's movement either, and this is an oddball case. Oh well. I will recover. I guess that is what I am supposed to do because I am a man. No wonder men don't report being victims.
May 7th, 2008 at 5:37 pm
My friend and former housemate, 6'2", 350+ pounds at the time, was abused by his then-girlfriend, back in the '70s. His theory and opinion, after going through that experience, is that some kinds of women (i.e. crazy ones) seek out big and tall men and try to provoke them to rage and physical violence so that they (the women) can get the beating they secretly crave. (Why? I don't know. Some people like to be degraded because they feel that they deserve it, or they grew up being abused by their parents, or... who knows... people are crazy for lots of reasons.) When my friend wouldn't play that game with his GF, she went ballistic and beat *him* up, knocking out one of his front teeth. He didn't try to fight back, because, as every man in our generation learned as a young boy, "it's wrong to hit a girl", even when the girl hits first. He didn't seek legal recourse, either. I'm sure he felt it would have been futile.
Amazingly, my friend isn't bitter about his ex-GF, although IMHO he has every right to be. (BTW, he is now engaged to a lovely woman who is not crazy.)
May 7th, 2008 at 5:55 pm
Sorry, that was '90s, not '70s. :-P I don't suppose it really matters, though, as the legal climate hasn't changed since the Victorian era where woman-on-man violence is concerned.
May 7th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
When my foreign-born wife arrived in the U.S. some eight years ago, she was shocked by the number of times -- on television and in movies -- she saw women striking, kicking or otherwise visiting pain upon men in response to perceived slights, insults or exasperation, all presented as if this were completely normal, understandable and appropriate behavior. Then I started noticing it, too.
Where are all the folks who complain about the desensitizing effects of repetitive, gratuitous violence upon an audience?
May 7th, 2008 at 7:42 pm
"Jean,
I don't know how you KNOW this information about the teacher. I call your bluff on this one.
Er... huh? Who is "Jean," and what "teacher" are you talking about?
May 7th, 2008 at 9:58 pm
How soon we forgot about John Wayne Bobbitt. That had to be the biggest laugh for them of all time.
May 7th, 2008 at 10:12 pm
Mary in LA
I agree with his assumption. My ex-wife (abuser) longed to be a victim. I believe the more involved she got in running a DV shelter and seeing the attention the victims got, made her even worse.
May 8th, 2008 at 12:21 am
About the "men having no pain tolerance" thing. I went in for a kidney stone and the nurse said she'd rather have all five of her children again than have one more kidney stone herself. And it's men who have nearly all the kidney stones.
May 8th, 2008 at 12:33 am
Bill C., thanks for your reply!
I was shocked to read that your abuser runs a victims' shelter -- that's what I call a perverse situation! Your attention theory makes sense. It's a truism that some people will do anything for attention, even negative attention resulting from doing horrible things. I am very sorry for all you've gone through. My hat is off to you for still being sane at the end of it.
May 8th, 2008 at 8:36 am
You see this disregard for battered males on many TV shows, including court TV, all the time. Several times there's been men claiming severe injuries when his girlfriend or wife assaulted him, and the judge and audiance always laugh and chuckle at it. The message given is that it's cute when women assault men, but when the other way around the male is a monster.
These TV judges may be just entertainment but they are real judges. Their behavior and bias mirrors exactly the way judges in courtrooms across America think of violence against males. They don't take it seriously and don't hold violent women accountable.
It's the same mentality that has many programs, and even judges and police officers, commonly making jokes about males raped in prison, yet they would never dream of making the same jokes about rape of a female.
Males of all ages are definitely viewed as being unworthy of the same rights and consideration as females.
May 8th, 2008 at 8:59 am
Thanks Mary,
There is no comedy in a man being beaten or abused mentally by a woman. I am so much happier today though. She has been out of my life for 2 years, but I still watch my back. I still get nervous if I see a car that is like hers. Thankfully she moved about 35 miles away, but you never know. I have had nightmares that she was in my house. One of the reasons the Judge granted me the protection order was because she had broken into my house while we were legally seperated. This is a violent woman, and yes it is a "perverse situation" with her running a domestic violence shelter for women and children.
I have called the State, and any local agencies to try and get some help, and no one has helped at all. She makes $50,000 a year, and my income tanked with the real estate market here in Florida. I am going through a foreclosure on my house and bankruptcy. I know for a fact that if a woman was in my position, there would be an abundance of help, as she would be recognized as a victim of DV. Personally, I am okay in that I am just glad I am not with her anymore. Foreclosure and bankruptcy are nothing compared to what I was going through with her.
May 8th, 2008 at 9:00 am
Gran,
Great stuff! Right on target!
May 11th, 2008 at 3:28 am
"Rob Marinko Says:
May 5th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
First, I do want to thank Glenn for referring to me as "normally reasonable." If the producers were reasonably normal they wouldn't have a crack ho like Amy Winehouse contributing to the usually great James Bond movie scores, but I digress.
What can I say - I'm a huge Bond fan and I just hope the poor bastard's failure to dodge his wife cutlery doesn't delay the film's release. I'm happy to hear that he at least got in a few shots himself."
I am amazed that nobody has picked up on this comment by one of the "perpetrators" himself. Assuming it is for real, of course.
If it is for real, then Rob you are deserving of the criticism that has come your way. Your comments are probably flippant, but that does not make them any more acceptable. Being on the receiving end of a dangerous weapon does not warrant the comment of "failure to dodge" it. Would you commiserate with a raped woman for "failure to dodge" the penis of her attacker? And since when does the near death of a man take second place to getting a film released on time? What is more important? Then to be "happy" that he got a few shots in himself...so two people trying to inflict deadly harm on one another is a cause for happiness?
No wonder our society is diagnosed as sick when people with this kind of attitude get to be co-host on a radio show.