The new USA Today article Women Increasingly Paying Alimony features women who are unhappy that they have to pay alimony. Some of the complaints seem to have validity, but it struck me as odd that the article explained in great detail the women's feelings but not once did they ask any of the men who were receiving alimony for their side of the story.

The article centers on the complaints of Kim Shamsky. The article states:

"The picture of equality looks awfully strange to Kim Shamsky. The 47-year-old business owner pays her ex, a 65-year-old retired Major League Baseball player, thousands per month in temporary spousal support.

"He's not seeking alimony to help pay for the kids' birthday parties, since they don't have children. Nor was he instrumental in building her business. They married seven years after she started a handful of staffing firms and amassed a small fortune on her own. The daughter of a New York City taxi driver, Shamsky started her first staffing agency at age 27 with the help of a 21% loan. Not only was she able to make her first business profitable, but she's also worked furiously to ensure the success of all five businesses she's started since. Small wonder she is outraged at having to pay thousands of dollars a month to her ex.

"'He used to scream and throw tantrums and demand more money,' Shamsky says of her ex-husband.’ It was like he thought, 'Hey, you have money, why shouldn't I?' She adds flatly: 'I will never marry again. And I'm getting T-shirts made with the word 'prenup' written across the chest'...

"Kim Shamsky admits she's angry about paying her ex-husband spousal support mostly because he's a man. After all, men are supposed to be breadwinners, not bread takers.

"'A real man just wouldn't do this sort of thing,' she says.’ Maybe it's my Italian upbringing, but I don't think it's right.'"

The article doesn't say so, but the ex-husband is Art Shamsky (pictured below), a pretty good ballplayer who was an important part of the 1969 "Miracle Mets" World Championship team. For those of you who think "baseball player equals rich," remember that Art Shamsky played in the era when baseball players were paid very poorly.  It was not until the mid-1970s that Marvin Miller and the baseball players' union employed a combination of strikes and legal action to vastly increase the salaries of major leaguers. From what I can tell, the best salary Shamsky ever drew in baseball was the $25,000 he earned in 1972, his final season.

According to a New York Post article from last fall:

"Shamsky, 65, says in legal papers that his wife, Kim, abused and emasculated him, throwing 'temper tantrums,' calling him names and saying she was 'the man in the marriage.'

"The ex-outfielder, who hit .300 for the champion 1969 Mets, filed for divorce in January after a blowout at the couple's home.

"He says in court papers that she threw his cellphone out the window during the fight.

"On other occasions, he claims, she slapped him, spat in his face and slammed down a ketchup bottle in anger. She also called him an 'old bastard' and other insults, he says, making his life 'miserable.'"

In the Post article Kim Shamsky portrays Art as a lazy ne'er do well. That strikes me as an odd description of a man who beat out odds of 10,000 to one to become one of the top few hundred men in the world at his chosen profession.

I have no idea if Art Shamsky's claims of abuse are true and if he really is financially exploiting his ex-wife. But it would have been nice if we could have at least heard what he had to say.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 14th, 2007 at 12:08 pm and is filed under Family Law, Feminism/NOW, Baseball/Sports, Fathers' Rights/Noncustodial parents' rights, Marriage, Media, Sexism, Divorce/Separation/Child Custody, Gender Issues (Misc.), Men, Women and Work.