In Alabama, Non-Custodial Dad has no Right to See Daughter's Report Card
November 12th, 2009 by Robert Franklin, Esq.As if there aren't enough barriers between fathers and their children, here's another one (Selma Times-Journal, 11/7/09).
The writer, Terry Lewis, is a non-custodial father. But whatever parental rights the family court and family laws of Alabama believe he has, his ex-wife and bureaucrats in the educational establishment have other ideas. His case is a simple one; he wanted to see his daughter's report card to see how she's coming along in school. The response by the school principal?
“It’s against the law for us to share that information with you sir.”
Hmm. I wonder where they got the idea that providing information on a child's grades to her parent is illegal. And if it is illegal, I wonder why it is.
As Lewis goes on to write,
The educational establishment here in Selma loves to whine about the lack of parental involvement, but when a parent actually shows up—especially a father... they stonewall them
Yep. Add that to the list of mountains dads have to climb to be a part of their children's lives.
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November 12th, 2009 at 8:07 pm
In Alabama, Non-Custodial Dad has no Right to See Daughter's Report Card
I love the way Obama talks smack about fathers needing to step up and take responsibility and be dads then when they try to they are spit on and slapped in the face. Treated like a piece of crap...
November 12th, 2009 at 8:08 pm
Yet, Terri Lewis is expected to pay that child support right? LOL
November 12th, 2009 at 9:12 pm
I just read “A kidnapped mind” by Pamela Richardson, a heartbreaking story about parental alienation in which her son committed suicide when he was 16 years old.
She wasn’t even aloud on the school property...
It truly, just blows my mind that this crap is permitted to happen!
How sad for all innocent children of divorce!
November 12th, 2009 at 9:23 pm
After my divorce, in which I was given physical custody, I moved to the next town. Only 15 minutes from where her father lived at the time, but far enough that she was enrolled into a different school district. When I enrolled her in the new school I was given a card to fill out for emergency contacts. Standard procedure, filled them out every school year and by this time she was in 6th grade. But this one had a section at the bottom that asked if there was anyone I wanted to restrict, as in having access to my child and her information. This was in 2001 and took me by surprise. The only person that came to mind was my ex father-in-law, who is an abusive, manipulative SOB. Yeah, I wrote his name on there even though the man lived over a thousand miles away. Better safe than sorry. But it never crossed my mind to list my ex. She is his child. After the military moved him out of state/country I would email him school updates. All other information he got directly from her, but like most kids she couldn’t be trusted to tell him the whole truth about her grades, especially if they were not so stellar.
Denying a parent access to their child or any information concerning that child (i.e., education or medical) without just cause is wrong in all cases.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
In Selma, Alabama we have another ironic display of civil rights violations that actually is State Sponsored Child Abuse - removing or preventing a fit parent from being involved in their childrens life.
Over 50 years after the civil rights fight in Alabama and throughout the USA the blatant civil rights violation continue against one segment of our society - fathers - who can not control their gender at birth no more than the those born of color can control the pigment in their skin.
I went to thelink and I read the postings underneath the fathers letter and the ignorance runs so rampant as so many have drank the kool-aid that dads are deadbeats and no one deserves a second chance if they have mistakenly not been involved in their childs life by ether their own doing or worse by alienation by the CP (usually the mother).
I will repeat as long as I have breath in my lungs - the current manner in which the judges deal with child custody cases - removing a fit parent from a childs life - is nothing short of STATE SPONSORED CHILD ABUSE.
I am continually embarrassed to be a life long resident of Alabama and for the leaders in this State to not learn from their violations of the blacks over 50 years ago and now doing to fathers what they are every day in the court systems by the judges and lawyers.
Things can be changed for the better but only when the people demand it from the elected politicians.
Chris Hobbs
www Why Judge Little com
November 13th, 2009 at 12:18 am
but obama just put out a commercial for dad's to spend more time with their kids....lol
November 13th, 2009 at 6:56 am
@john
They are such hipocrites
November 13th, 2009 at 8:09 am
men are not in charge of there own lives anymore, but it isn't in your face on every issue. it's there alright, just not seen nor addressed much by the majority. i have come to believe that women truly the stronger sex. they never take no for answer and men almost always belly up like a dominated animal being controlled by the more powerful, agile and cleaver creature.
November 13th, 2009 at 8:10 am
Same thing happened to me. I live 2 miles from my son, my ex has full custody. We do not have a working relationship and the courts sided with her on every issue even though there was no proof of any of her allegations against me (all of which were untrue). Since I do not have any idea of what he is up to, but still am trying to be involved, I went to his school and asked if I could schedule a meeting with the school counselor to see if I can help with any school activities and to discuss my sons grades and how he is coming along. I was told that my ex did not list me as the father and therefore they had no idea of who I was and it would not be permissable. When I offered to show them the birth certificate and child support paperwork they offered to have me arrested if I did not leave the premises.
November 13th, 2009 at 9:20 am
IT IS INSANE to think that because two people get divorced that only one of them should be able to have access to school or medical records. It does not even make any sense to think that a parent should be less involved in their childs life. I also find it simply amazing that the 50 states have such different custody laws but yet our FEDERAL GOVERNMENT has decided that they should ALL HAVE THE SAME LAW when it comes to collecting the money and provide federal funding for that.
I have to give a little credit where credit is due. Texas at least has the presumption of joint custody. THE ONLY BENEFIT it gives me is being able to have access to medical and school records. My child is not in school yet, and I am quite sure the EX will not put me on his school information, so I am willing to bet I will get to see how my judge will enforce it.
How is there not more outrage about this ? Come on everyone. These are our children. There should be nothing more important on the face of the earth than our children. Child custody issuses are barely on the map and our divorce rate in America is 55%. Factor in the out of wed lock children and the total number of children affected is OUTRAGOUES.
A parents money is important, but the fact that the MONEY IS VALUED AS MORE IMPORTANT TO YOUR CHILDREN THAN YOU ARE SHOULD BE ENOUGH TO MOTIVATE ANYONE.
November 13th, 2009 at 10:09 am
re: IT IS INSANE to think that because two people get divorced that only one of them should be able to have access to school or medical records. It does not even make any sense to think that a parent should be less involved in their childs life.
...in western culture, children are property of the mother. Father participation (outside of mandatory financial contributions that could be in excess of what he can afford) will be at the discretion of the mother.
November 13th, 2009 at 10:10 am
re: I love the way Obama talks smack about fathers needing to step up and take responsibility and be dads then when they try to they are spit on and slapped in the face. Treated like a piece of crap...
...Obama will dance to whatever tune called by the feminists. What were you expecting from the guy? Courage??
November 13th, 2009 at 10:39 am
You have to know when to call
MikeL, I would have been happy to call their bluff and let them bring the police in, getting them told off by the officer for wasting their time, and then asking for the report number and calling the story into various newspapers until one of them picks it up.
Headline: "School calls police on concerned father"
Regarding the story in general: Schools are concerned about possible litigation from getting between court battles between custodial and non-custodial parents. It's probably cowardice on their part rather than apathy towards fathers (although that's probably part of it.)
Funny story: A friend of mine asked me to pick up her daughter from school. I went there and the teachers had me sign a log book which I appreciate. A week later, another roommate, a woman did the same thing and she didn't have to sign in. Lesson: If someone is going to abduct a child, get a woman accomplice!
November 13th, 2009 at 10:48 am
Paulette, It is amazing what the whole gambit of the system can do to those who are targeted. I met with Pamela Richardson, but have yet to read her book that she dedicated to my children. There are parents, usually fathers, who can't even drive by to get a look at their child playing at recess in the school yard. In my case my children were unlawfully detained and locked up by principle Stephen Baber. The School board, the York Region Children;'s Aid Society, the police are all attempting to shield this principle who grossly violated the rights of my children.
Here is a video describing what happened to them on December 4, 2008. http://vimeo.com/5023797 This whole mess was initiated by my very bitter ex-wife who seems to be in bed with the local CAS for reasons other than our children's best or even better interest. Reading through the CAS file says a lot about the pathetic work they have done. The file which stands 6" high is perhaps 1,500 to 2,000 pages. We estimate the cost to the taxpayer to be about $40-$50 thousand dollars and CAS did NOTHING good for our family other than cause conflict, harm and financial hardship while they calmly go over budget and eject a board member for saying their spending is out of control. However, the truth always comes out. I can now understand what they were attempting to conceal, shoddy work! They took over a year to get me file disclosure telling me there was no information, a pathetic stall tactic. "You can run, but you can't hide. (forever)" (You can go and email or fax this to Jim now.)
Anyone that has children in school, that has CAS/CPS involved in their family or if you are an educator and within the education system should read this highly educational comprehensive paper about YOUR rights with respect to YOUR children being interrogated by over zealous child protection workers who are NOT even licensed to practice social work!!! We have found school protocols that promote the violation of the Canadian Criminal Code and the Canadian Charter of Rights. “A guide for school officials and private child care providers in Ontario”
http://www.canadacourtwatch.com/Studies/SchoolsAndCASGuide.pdf an invaluable document to read.
Parents should NEVER be disallowed access to their children’s educational records! What harm could it be to allow a parent this fundamental right. What needs to happen is CAS/CPS workers ought to be barred from getting anywhere near your child without just cause and certainly NEVER without following laws and legislation that binds them to act in a specified manner!
Attila
P.S. Paulette it was good speaking with you at the second PAS conference, sorry for missing the Halloween party (too sick to go) and thank you and your daring friends for all your hard work! It is really appreciated and it makes a huge difference.
November 13th, 2009 at 10:49 am
@ PJK........in western culture, children are property of the mother. Father participation (outside of mandatory financial contributions that could be in excess of what he can afford) will be at the discretion of the mother.
I can not argue with you PJK nor do I wish too. You are pretty much right. One of my elected officials recommended to me that I should join a childrens rights group. He would not come out and say it, but he knows things are not fair or just. But what is he....A POLITICIAN. There is so much more involved in issuses than just right and wrong. THERE ARE LOBYISTS.....WOMENS RIGHTS GROUPS.....MONEY and a whole slew of other factors that go into this besides THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD. That term is just a red herring to give them the right to do what they want to. Read some legislation. Read your STATES version of title IV-D and also the FEDERAL LAW TITLE IV-D. It is written that way for a reason. Did they discriminate ????????? Yes they did.....but their answer is..........no discrimination.....IT WAS IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD.
I love the way Obama talks smack about fathers needing to step up and take responsibility and be dads then when they try to they are spit on and slapped in the face. Treated like a piece of crap...
You have a major point and I for one do not understand why EVERY CHILDRENS RIGHTS GROUP and NON CUSTODIAL PARENT are not hammering OBAMA. Why is nobody asking him WHY IS THERE FEDERAL FUNDING AND FEDERAL LAW WHEN IT COMES TO MONEY ISSUSES.......BUT THERE IS NO FEDERAL ASSISTANCE (my attorney generals office told me there is a federal law prohibiting them from helping in custody issuses) TO MAKE SURE THAT SAME PARENT GETS TO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH THAT CHILD.
It is time to get off the sideline and onto the playing field. This is not going to change overnight. If you only watch the news the politicians bank on you shutting up and getting on with you life. I am not against anyone who marries a woman with children, but I will tell you what. If men quit.............women would not run from one to another.
November 13th, 2009 at 10:58 am
Mike L. Said:
"When I offered to show them the birth certificate and child support paperwork they offered to have me arrested if I did not leave the premises."
I know how you feel. When I met with the school principal to let him know what he did to my children was very wrong, Stephen Baber actually threatened me to contact the School Board lawyers and issue a no trespass warrant against me! Pure intimidation that DID NOT WORK!!! Pathetic is this man who has no business being near children.
Don't give up Mike! You must fight for your rights!!! I think Joint Custody should be mandatory and the parent that wants Sole Custody would have the burden of proof that the other parent is unfit for that basic fundamental right!
Attila
November 13th, 2009 at 11:01 am
re: THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD. That term is just a red herring to give them the right to do what they want to
...Dr. Phil had this guy on last year who was 100% duped into paying child support for a child that wasn't his by his smug ex-wife. Attorney Gloria Allred said he should have to keep on supporting the child under these conditions because of - you guessed it - "the best interests of the child." That clause is used to justify blatant unfairness. The government pits the big bad man against the child. Disgusting.
FWIW, I was reading some stuff about why the government does nothing to enforce visitation orders. Well, there's no money in it, of course. There's federal funding when you collect child support. Zippo for enforcing visitation.
November 13th, 2009 at 11:26 am
BTW, ya'll should really check out the comments by archangelsk on that article, they're just a hoot. Assumptions, jumping to conclucsions, etc.
November 13th, 2009 at 12:00 pm
My EX took her temperature everyday for (4) months trying to get pregnant. Eleven (11) days after my child was born she filed for divorce. It was recomended to me that I have a DNA test done. When a child is that young, it is really hard to tell who they look like. I was told that if I found out say 2 years down the road that the child WAS NOT mine, that I would be stuck paying child support and in affect have a child even though it was not mine. The DNA test SHOWED that my child was MINE, but to think that I could have been made to pay for a child that was not is OUTLANDISH. GET OFF THE SIDELINES. GET INVOLVED. READ THE LAW. CONTACT YOUR ELECTED OFFICIALS. JOIN A PARENTS RIGHTS GROUP AND LOBBY. THESE ARE OUR CHILDREN........THE POLITICIANS BANK ON YOU JUST SHUTTING UP AND TAKING IT. OUR CONSTITUTION IS STILL........WE THE PEOPLE.
November 13th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
I forgot to add PJK....You are absolutely right. The 50 states get federal money based on child support. It is a business for the 50 states. A parents money is valued as more importnat to a child than the parent themselves. Read your states, and the federal TITLE IV-D law. Elections have consequences, and the person elected still needs to be watch doged. WE THE PEOPLE.
November 13th, 2009 at 3:33 pm
i didnt read the article, but its my understanding that if the CP has SOLE CUSTODY, the NCP basically has Child Support Rights, and whatever crap the courts give as visitation. In order to MAYBE get a look at school records or give your kid a haircut, or LEGALLY take the child to the doctor, you need to have JOINT custody, or you could get yourself into legal trouble if the CP wants to be vindictive.
My Story.
My 15yr old boy, got left back in 9th grade, so i make my play for custody. I go to the school, talk to all the teachers and the social work, and the all BEG ME.. PLEAAAASE go get custody of your kids.. their mother is just not right in the head. (My ex wife is VERY involved with the kids schooling and such things, but she has the education level of a 5th grader (dyslexia) and is a very very nervous/depressed/self pitying person)
i was BEGGED by EVERY teacher to take custody.
I talk it over with my kids, with my EX, with my GF, with everyone. and everyone agreed, (except the ex, cause $2200/mo in cp isnt easy to let go, huh) i should go for it.
so i file the paper work, and off i go to the school to get copies of transcripts.
I go to the elementary school and everyone there knows me.. i say im going for custody, and they cant make me copies of ALL the kids records fast enough. three cheers for dad!
I go to the junior high school, and no one knows me (divorced when the oldest was only 8), but they all know my Girlfriend (yes, i robbed the cradle.. so what! :)) so she talks to the teachers and guidance counselors, and when they find out im going for custody, they give every sheet of paper they have on my kids.. grades, social worker evals, etc, no problem and they all say congratulations (they KNEW i would get custody, because my ex was what she was)
i get to the high school, and all the teachers were on my side, once the guidance counselor found out what was up, he called me in and we spoke. He just so happened to be "versed in family law" and proceeded to grill me on what kind of custody i had.
so i said "My ex has PHYSICAL, and WE have JOINT" he chuckled and said, nothing like that exists. You either have Joint, or you dont, and since he didnt think i had joint, i wasnt entitled to see anything.
so i said, i have JOINT, but not SHARED. we dont split time, im regulated to be a disney dad, but i have a 15yr old boy that just got left back. What are his fucking options?? its not like he can marry a rich woman and have her take care of him.. so he either goes to jail, or dies. I need custody, so i can straighten him out.
I was escorted out of the school by a very nervous vice principal and security. Didnt really matter as several concerned teachers got me all his transcripts anyways.
It turns out, that on the little blue cards they gave at the high school that says who is allowed to pickup the child, or who may be called in an emergency, my exwife went and removed me from all the cards. Thats all it took.
End of this chapter....
i filed for custody, represented myself, the ex got a free attorney when she saw i wasnt paying for one, and i got full SOLE custody of my son in 6 months.
The sad part, is i ONLY got custody in such a short time (it takes about 2 years in nyc for a contested custody battle) because my exwife's lawyer said if you make this go for 2 years, its going to cost BOTH of you about 15,000 EACH at a minimum, and your son will be 17 years old in the 9th grade.... IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT, because if that happens, theres a REALLY good chance the father wont take him when he is so ruined after all??
1 kid down, 2 more to go...
November 13th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
"re: THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD. That term is just a red herring to give them the right to do what they want to"
Yep. This is the fuzziest, warmest piece of nonsense ever. And it's almost always used to deny a father his CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT to his own child. That's right. Men absolutely have a CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT to have custody of and parent their own children equal to mom. When will one of these child custody cases end up at the Supreme Court?
Thanks for mentioning G. A. BTW. I almost puked. Can we have a rule of moderation that her name not be mentioned?
November 13th, 2009 at 4:18 pm
"i robbed the cradle..."
Men are attracted to young women. Men have been this way for 40,000 years or so and it was entirely normal and accepted until about 100 years ago or so. Enter feminism... The term "cradle robbing" is a phrase made up by old feminist hags to shame men into caring for women their own age. @#$% them. Hold your head high.
November 13th, 2009 at 5:48 pm
Yeah look at mary K L. and the big female teacher list.
November 14th, 2009 at 5:49 am
Here's a write up I did for a fathers' group in Ohio a few years ago. Some of the information is relevant only to Ohio. But there are protections federal protections provided by FERPA, too.
Don
==========
Both federal law and Ohio state law grant to non-residential (non-custodial) parents the same right to receive copies of their children's school records that residential (custodial) parents have.
The Federal Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA), grants to all parents custodial and noncustodialthe right to inspect their child's school records unless this right has been specifically legally revoked.
Section 99.4 of FERPA states:
An educational agency or institution shall give full rights under the Act to either parent, unless the agency or institution has been provided with evidence that there is a court order, State statute, or legally binding document relating to such matters as divorce, separation, or custody that specifically revokes these rights.
Section 3109.05.1 of the Ohio Revised Code, goes even further. It requires that:
a parent of a child who is not the residential parent of the child is entitled to access, under the same terms and conditions under which access is provided to the residential parent, to any record that is related to the child and to which the residential parent of the child legally is provided access, unless the court determines that it would not be in the best interest of the child for the parent who is not the residential parent to have access to the records under those same terms and conditions (emphasis added).
The Separated Parenting Access and Resources Center (SPARC) has very useful information to help you get your child's school records on their web page "Getting Access to Your Child's Report Cards and School Records".
The site includes sample letters and tips for cooperative interactions with schools.
The Ohio Association of Elementary School Administrators provides a useful summary of Ohio law concerning access to children's school records, activities and events on their Letter of the Law page.
November 15th, 2009 at 11:57 pm
The schools in Riverside county treat Fathers like criminals. One father has 3 degress mother has a high school education. Yet Dad isnt allowed to talk about college for his daughter. Imagine that!