Murderous Florida Father Deserved a Necktie Party, not Shared Parenting
January 7th, 2007 by Glenn Sacks, MA for Fathers & FamiliesI have been surprised and disappointed at the reactions of men's rights advocates Gordon E. Finley, Ph.D. and the activists at the Manumit Exchange to the Tony Camacho case. Camacho, a Florida father of two, was embroiled in a custody dispute when he set his house on fire and killed himself and his two children, ages 10 and 8.
The reaction? One of the activists at the Manumit Exchange wrote:
"This tragedy may not have happened occurred if a presumption of shared parenting (physical joint custody and residency) were law and the father knew that his children were not going to be kidnapped from him by his ex-wife and the State."
Similarly, Finley penned the brief letter Shared parenting may save lives for the South Florida Sun-Sentinel, in which he argues that if Camacho had been granted shared parenting, the whole thing would never have happened, thus the family law system is at least partly to blame.
Sorry, guys, but I'll have to pass on this one. Camacho didn't deserve shared parenting, he deserved a necktie party.
According to one news article, "Camacho set the house on fire eight days after the [custody] ruling, Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office officials said. He died of smoke inhalation after stabbing Crystal [his eight year-old daughter] in the back, severing her spine and leaving her paralyzed as the flames engulfed their home, according to the sheriff's office." A loving parent, no matter how distraught, could never bring him or herself to do such a thing.
Moreover, according to the article Psychologist saw paranoia in dad before he set fatal fire, Camacho was offered shared parenting but was so controlling and obsessive that he rejected it, demanding sole custody. Moreover, just as so many divorcing women are vindictive and denigrate the children's father in front of the children, according to the psychologist in this case, Camacho did the same thing to his ex-wife. It was Camacho, not his ex-wife, who was refusing to share custody. When he couldn't get sole custody, he killed himself and took both of his kids with him.
This reaction to the Camacho killings reminds me of the reactions of some to Darren Mack. Mack, a Nevada "father" who was embroiled in a custody dispute last year, stabbed and killed his estranged wife as his little daughter played with her toys downstairs, and then shot and almost killed the Nevada family law judge who presided over his family law case.
After the Mack murder, some idiots in the fathers' rights movement defended him, comparing him to the Founding Fathers' struggle against British tyranny. (To be clear, not Finley or the Manumit Exchange, but others). I responded to these claims in my commentary Thomas Jefferson Murdered Women? I wrote:
"Last week I discussed the case of Darren Mack, the Nevada man who (allegedly) stabbed his estranged wife and shot and wounded a family court judge earlier this month. I wrote:
"'I'm not sure that this even needs to be said but I will say it anyway--I condemn without qualification the crimes allegedly committed by Darren Mack in Nevada last week.
"'Mack was angered by his divorce and custody case. Some on the not insubstantial lunatic fringe of the fathers' rights movement see Mack as some sort of freedom fighter. Most of the commentary by other fathers' rights advocates seem to be of the 'he couldn't take it any more and snapped' variety.
"'I don't buy it. Though everyone is focusing on Mack's attempted murder of a judge, everyone seems to forget that he first stabbed and killed his estranged wife. After murdering her, he shot the judge through the judge's third-floor office window with a sniper rifle from over 100 yards away. That's not 'snapping'--that's premeditated murder.
"'Mack is not a good man trapped in a bad system. He is a bad guy. Because of men like him the system had to create protections for women, and unscrupulous women have misused those protections to victimize countless innocent men. Men like Mack aren't the byproducts of the system's problems--they are the problem.'"
"I contrasted Mack with the heroic English father David Chick, who was denied access to his little girl, and who launched a world famous, traffic snarling, peaceful, six day, one-man protest atop a 150 foot high crane near the Tower Bridge in London in November 2003. I noted:
"'David Chick acted with humanity and courage. Darren Mack possesses neither.'
"Recent reports indicate that Mack is even sicker than I had imagined. According to this article '[during] a search of Mack's townhouse, police turned up a shoe, towels and a t-shirt all with red stains after his estranged wife, was found dead there. Also, police say they discovered more than 50 boxes of ammunition and four empty rifle cases.'
"According to Mack's room held bomb parts (Reno Gazette-Journal, 6/20/06), Mack 'had bombmaking materials in his bedroom.'
"'The materials, when mixed together and attached to a blasting cap or shot at, will explode, said Washoe County sheriff's Sgt. Lou Gazes, head of the Consolidated Bomb Squad for Washoe County, Reno and Sparks and who was at Mack's apartment.
"'There were materials that could have made a bomb,' Gazes said Monday...
"The police search of Mack's apartment also found 'several boxes of firearm ammunition, including .223-caliber and .243-caliber rifle ammunition which was strewn about a floor in one of the bedrooms'...and police found 'an empty rifle case which contained a receipt from the purchase of a Bushmaster .223 caliber rifle by Darren Roy Mack'...the rifle was 'equipped with a laser sighting device.'"
"Mack and some of his supporters at the extreme end of the fathers' rights movement are comparing his actions to those of George Washington, Thomas Jefferson and the other revolutionaries who took up arms against British tyranny. I used to be a History teacher but I guess my memory is failing me a bit--tell me, Darren, when did Thomas Jefferson stab women?"
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January 8th, 2007 at 8:21 am
"Because of men like him the system had to create protections for women, and unscrupulous women have misused those protections to victimize countless innocent men. Men like Mack aren’t the byproducts of the system’s problems–they are the problem."
This is true.
Those who have designed a system without shared parenting must consider scientific evidence to the following questions: (1) Are single-parent families more likely to produce a greater number of men like Mack? (2) Are children in greater danger when raised in single-parent families?
January 8th, 2007 at 8:59 am
I'm with you on this one Glenn. 110 percent.
Mr. Camacho didn't deserve custody of the children. He deserved the custody of a jail cell. I would think that outspoken members of the men's rights movement would be more balanced than to resort to what Dr. Finley and the Manumit Exchange stated. And, because of these activists' claims that it "might" or "may have" prevented this crime, I say this. Sorry gentlemen: speculation is not used as a good defense to cover up this heinous crime. I think we should see what this Florida man and this other individual Mr. Mack rightfully is: a criminal, a child killer, a woman-hater, an abuser and a thug who should be getting no protection from us. They are everything that I and everyone else in this movement should personally stand against. So, in turn, I condemn what these MRA activists are saying. The law wasn't the one that was in question: it was the mental sanity of the father that was in question and these individuals failed to see that.
January 8th, 2007 at 9:51 pm
The truth is we will never know what might have been in this particular instants, if thing had been done differently, but we do know crimes are the result of motive and opportunity, and the more justice, a system, the more likely a person is to see they have a means of achieving their objective without resorting to crime.
If this is not true, ask one question, if all a person does will result in punishment, what difference does it make what they do?
JT
January 10th, 2007 at 8:10 am
I have always liked Sacks' writings but I must say the end of this article disturbs me.
"When did Thomas Jefferson stab women?" Darren Mack stabbed a woman and shot a man. Why did Sacks not ask "When did Thomas Jefferson shoot men?" Well obviously because whether Jefferson personally shot a man or not he was involved in a revolution where many men were shot. Sacks' statement is not about Jefferson's level of violence but about that violence against women is worse than violence against men. I find this disturbing coming from one of the best known voices of the men's movement.
We all know the stats, men are 98% of combat fatalities, 90% of workplace fatalities, men are the victims of 70% of violent crime, men die 6 years earlier, commit suicide 5 times as often, etc, etc, etc... Men's lives are undervalued and I suspect this is one of the primary roots of many biases against us. I would ask Mr. Sacks to not feed these biases.
It should be a primary goal of the men's movement to get society at large to value men's lives as much as women's.
February 10th, 2007 at 8:55 am
[...] Who's the next "hero" for these loonies–Tony Camacho? [...]
April 21st, 2008 at 1:33 pm
[...] I Agree with the Feminists on this One [...]
April 21st, 2008 at 9:46 pm
My opinion is that we need to know ALL the circumstances and happenings before passing judgment on this guy for the actions he took.
October 22nd, 2008 at 9:52 am
He plotted the murders for several months by buying gasoline and stockpiling it. He had threatened to kill his wife and she had a protective order against him. He was very manipulative and cunning. Prior to killing the children, he had not abused them though, that is why his ex-wife was willing to share parenting with him.
The doctor knew there were problems, but did nothing to help those children. The doctor knew for a fact that the guy might kill his wife. He obviously does not consider wife-killing to be a cause for concern. This same doctor trained with Richard Gardner and is a frequent parental alienation accuser in cases with documented domestic violence and child abuse.
December 22nd, 2008 at 9:48 pm
Never Daddies' fault is it?
April 20th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
Of course it's dad's fault. But there were other people that allowed it to happen by failing to recognize the seriousness of his threats. The legal system is full of these psychologists, and there are pleny of judges who will listen to the psychobabble instead of listening to statements made by firsthand witnesses.